smooth

A guy from work, Tommy, has been pestering me to go bar hopping with him for at least a month. I finally gave in and told him I would go out Saturday night if he remembered to send me a text.

Sure enough, Saturday I received a text "Wanna go out tonight?" I figured why the hell not so I called up a work friend Lesley and asked her to go. Plus, earlier that day I bought a new pair of hot sex black patent Guess pumps that needed to have their debut. (I tried to find a picture, but couldn't)

I planned on going home after the night was over. When I picked up Lesley, I told her the plan, I would drink before we left if she would drive, have one drink at the bar and quit for the rest of the night so I could drive her home.

I started drinking and had a bit of a buzz by the time we made it to DownTown BigCity, we went to two sort of upscale bars that are connected. I like more of laid back place, but Tommy wanted to go so we gave in. We get inside and I immediately had to wait about 15 minutes to pee. Then I made my happy, slightly tipsy, self to the bar and ordered my favorite, Gin and Tonic.

Tommy decides he wants to dance. He is off dancing like a fool (no literally, dancing like a fool. He looked like John Travolta during his Saturday Night Fever days). We make our way to the dance portion of the bar. At the corner of the dance floor there was a little box for the bouncers/drunk women to stand on. Trying to act smooth, I was dancing in front of it and decided to step back onto it. Before I took my first step back and up, I looked at Lesley and said "Now this is how it's done."

I didn't make it.

I am not smooth.

I fell forward and twisted my ankle and was caught by a man with an afro and buck teeth. He was an ugly version of the Reading Rainbow guy, afro flat top included. Thank God I didn't break my ankle new heels. It would have been catastrophic.

AfroMan/ReadingRainbow looked at me after the tumble and said "I've been watching you all night and been waiting for a chance to ask you to dance." I looked at him, snarled my nose and pointed down, "Can't dance, I'm hurt."

Then he starts grinding on Lesley. Not only did I feel humiliated for her because I declined the bozo and he went for her, but I felt bad because HE HAD A BONER. Pure class people, pure class.

Your ankle breaker,
Rose