Obviously I couldn't come up with something legit to write about yesterday. Waiting until today was a brilliant idea. I have a decent (if strange) topic to blog about.
I needed to make a trip to the local Wal-Mart (why, oh why is Target so far away?!) last night. Apparently I should have just gone to Target during my lunch break because my local store is apparently where all the creep status people hang out at night.
I went in on a mission. Yoga blocks. I grabbed my yoga blocks and several Naked smoothies (um, my absolute FAVORITE!) for the week. I went to the check out and of course all of the quick lanes were closed. I headed to one of the shorter check out lanes and got in line.
There were two people ahead of me, a woman with bleached blonde hair (dark roots, of course) with a shit ton of groceries and a ginger man with groceries as well. I was about to drop the smoothies (I had 2 of the big ones and 3 small ones and no basket) so when the ginger directly in front of me moved up a bit, I sat my drinks on the conveyor.
Apparently to him that meant I wanted to strike up a conversation.
He looked at what I was buying and started talking to me about the drinks. I immediately new this kid was weird. And quite possibly gay (I was relieved when he started talking and I knew he wasn't going to hit on me or ask for my number).
He told me he didn't like one of the flavors I was buying. He went on to tell me about another type of smoothie available that I should try. Blah, blah, blah. I avoided eye contact because he was starting to creep me out. No one should talk THAT much about a smoothie. I mean, I can deal with a short friendly conversation in the line at the supermarket if need be, but I prefer not to talk to anyone.
Finally he stopped talking. I engrossed myself with the gum hoping he would not feel the urge to strike up conversation round two.
I would say 30 seconds went by in silence.
Then he looked at me and said...
"Do you like pickles?"
I know I had the "what the fuck are you talking about?" look on my face. There are not pickles in smoothies. I looked around to see what he was talking about. I then saw that he had pickles in with his groceries, but he had quite a few groceries. It's not like he was just buying a a jar of pickles. I feel like the question came out of left field.
Words failed me. I couldn't come up with a good come back. I couldn't come up with anything. I didn't want to say yes because I didn't want to find out why he was asking. I just said "No." End of conversation.
He took forever to grab his bags. I immediately called Jill because I honestly felt like this guy was going to try and walk me to my car or something.
I'm still flabbergasted by the question. I'm sitting at my desk trying to figure out why in the hell you would ask a stranger if they like pickles... Maybe he was going to give me a recipe?
I just don't get it.
What's the dill, pickle?
Rose.
Friday, October 23, 2009
worth the wait.
Posted by Rose and Jill at 11:03 AM
Labels: bad pickup lines, classy, Did that really happen?, huh?, really?, walmart, where's Jill when I need her?, wow, WTF?
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6 comments:
What a weirdo...out of all things, pickles?
Maybe he was going to offer to slip you the pickle:-) I am sick. Clearly belonging with the freaks at the Walmart in Kentucky! Happy Friday;-)
I laughed out loud when I read, "Do you like pickles?" What a psycho thing to ask someone!
I think he just wants to be nice, some people who are a bit dorky like that often come as creepy..maybe he just wants to talk to you. I'm not saying it's not a bit weird though..
Yeah, but Rose - what if he were a Gavin Rossdale look alike and the random conversation took place in line at a Whole Foods or a Central Market (Do they have those stores in Kentucky? I know they have bourbon. Bourbon makes me happy.)
I bet Gavin Rossdale likes pickles - at least he probably enjoys a little branston pickle with his scotch eggs... and english mustard.
P.S. I got your naked smoothie right here! HEYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Dear Bachelor,
First off, Yes, we have Whole Foods (no Central Market, though).
Um, I am in love with Gavin Rossdale; illegitimate love child and all... how did you know?
I don't know wtf scotch eggs/English mustard are/is... So, for a man who strongly resembled him... I would answer the question. Then wink.
P.S. I'll bring the bourbon if you bring the naked smoothie ;)
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