Tuesday, February 9, 2010

The Iliad: Ted Edition

NOTE* This story actually occurred about three to four weeks ago.

God love him because I know his genes are responsible for my blonde hair (which is a vision if I do say so myself) and ability to be over-dramatic but my dad is too much for me to handle sometimes. Not only does dear ol' dad (to whom I affectionately call 'Ted' on a regular basis but only behind his back because he'd get piiissssed if I did it to his face) send me 'fun' emails in which he writes the way the cool hip kids (of age 13) would speak (i.e. Wadda ya up to? Well I'ma jus' sittin' here thinkin' about what're we gunnah have fur dinner...etc). But one of the things he does that kills me the most is his recounting of an event (he is severely lacking in skillzzz in this department). You see, Ted tells stories like they're the soap opera version of The Iliad: overly dramatic and entirely too long. Not only that, but he also has to retell them AT LEAST fifteen times and if all fifteen times are to the exact same person then so be-it. Take tonight's story for instance:

Ted: So Jack from across the street came over today.

(pause here for look of shock and awe...and dramatic effect)

Me: Okay.

Ted: APPARently (yes over emphasize the first half of the word) someone broke in so he was asking if we'd seen anything suspicious around their house lately.

Me: Oh. Well that's unfortunate...

Ted: sooo...(pause here for about a minute and a half -seriously) he said it's the THIRD break-in they've had...they stole a big wide-screen TV not even out of the box yet.

Me: I see...

(Pause here for another minute and a half to two minutes)

Ted: So if you leave the house...make sure you put the alarm on and everything.

Me (thinking): Like I've done since we got the alarm system when I was in. ooohhh sayyy 3rd grade? Side note* I'm 23 now with two undergraduate degree...

Me (actually said): ...Will do Pops...

So not only did I have to sit through this, and I shit you not when I say this, 25 minute ordeal, I had to listen to it ALL OVER AGAIN when my mom called from San Francisco to check in from her business meeting. There goes 50 minutes of my life I will never get back. *sigh*

37 comments:

Chloe said...

Dads always have the tendency to overdramatize things. Mine does as well.

Little T said...

I think all parents repeat themselves. It must go back to our teenage years when we ignored everything they said so now they think they have to say it 15 times and sloooowly;-)

彥宏 said...

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慧君慧君 said...

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楊怡均 said...

Quality is better than quantity.......................................................

賢諭 said...

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虹玟 said...

凡是遇到困擾的問題,不要把它當作可怕的,討厭的,無奈的遭遇,而要把它當作歷練、訓練和幫助。 ..................................................

吳wyat031tskiles8 said...

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Efforts to fight fuel!........................................................

天光天光 said...

生命是一頓豐富的宴席,有人卻寧可挨餓..................................................

柏懿綺辰 said...

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宛美黃惠妹 said...

幸福不是一切,人還有責任。..................................................

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Man proposes, God disposes...................................................................

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江婷 said...

人因夢想而偉大,要堅持自己的理想哦......................................................................

江婷 said...

知識可以傳授,智慧卻不行。每個人必須成為他自己。.................................................................

佳蓉佳蓉 said...

成熟,就是有能力適應生活中的模糊。.................................................................

ju吳phe宇te佳ns said...

感謝您費心的分享您的生活!讓我也感同身受!..................................................................

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來幫忙你衝人氣~順便留言支持你 ..................................................................

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楊儀卉 said...

一句話,那就是,"船到橋頭自然直."............................................................

廖珮秋廖珮秋 said...

要持續更新下去喲!!祝你心情愉快..................................................................

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人生都有不如意的時候~ 但你的BLOG帶給大家愉快的心情..................................................................

蔡靜芳蔡靜芳 said...

來塊巧克力吧~~心情會好哦~~..................................................................

曹彥均曹彥均 said...

人生中最好的禮物就是屬於自己的一部份..................................................

童祖如童祖如 said...

Never put off till tomorrow what may be done today..................................................................

邱允成邱允成 said...

Lets cross the bridge when we come to it............................................................

凱v胡倫 said...

It is easier to get than to keep it.......................................................................

凱許倫 said...

Pen and ink is wits plough...................................................................

允黃淑 said...

心平氣和~祝你也快樂~~..................................................

惠桂刁惠桂刁惠桂刁 said...

河水永遠是相同的,可是每一剎那又都是新的。..................................................

玉韓韓韓婷韓韓韓韓 said...

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張王雅竹欣虹 said...

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于庭吳 said...

多謝美味的心靈雞湯......................................................

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